The beast has arrived…
Dennis got an iPhone (his “precious”). That was how it started.
It started off innocently enough. Cris, being the good “people” that she is, decided to upgrade Dennis’ phone for his birthday. Now, we all want to harness the power of the “internets”, but this thing… it has great and terrible powers!
Dennis is not what I would consider a “power browser”, but no sooner than the device was in his hands, his thirst for surfing, online videos, and email became insatiable. The device has different effects on everybody, but Dennis became white and nerdy.
It took me just one cursed glance… and I saw the vision. A bone-chilling vision, seen through the eyes of a madman genius who has just broken the bonds of hell to enslave us all for eternity.
I come as His emissary. Fear not– come unto the fold now, and you will know rewards never before dreamed of! Throw down your false idols and embrace His eternal grace. He has arrived.